20 September 2018

Dear All,

Summer has hit the ‘Ou Transvaal’…..I would not ‘Goef’ yet because we have not had the first rains yet, and somehow, as you get older, the water seems to get colder…….. and Today is my 66th. Birthday…. Tukka feeling the age a ‘Bissel’…..

E-mazing that the Mikva @ Sandton Shul’s heater blew up over Yomtov, soooo the ‘Manne’ were warned that it was a cold ‘Mikva’ this year…..Had a Mini heat wave over Yom Kippur……

Three vampires walk into a bar. "What can I get ya?" asks the bartender.
"Blood," orders the first vampire.
"Make it two," says the second.
The bartender looks at the third. "What about you, buddy?"
"Plasma," says the vampire.
"Okay," replies the barman. "Let me make sure I’ve got this straight. 
Two bloods and a blood light." ( Einaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah…)

The All Blacks –Springbok test, was ‘just one of those days’, and against the current All Blacks, those days do not come very often…..Did the Boks win, or did the AB’s lose…. I think The All Blacks lost what should have been theirs and all credit to the ‘Bokke’ for somehow holding them out against all odds….. No, I did not really see any game plan, BUT …. The sheer determinations and guts took the Bokke through for a well-deserved win on the day……… not often you get two intercept tries against the AB’s in the same game……… All I ask is that supporters do not get ahead of themselves of this E-mazing win, we still have no real TEAM we can actually say that going forward are back up there with the best……… I believe with this unlikely win, the Boks could still go onto beat the Aussies, and a good chance of upsetting the All Blacks at ‘Fort Loftus’…….????

In Brakpan bly daar so baie mense in een huis, die ma maak pap in die wasmasjien en tee in die geyser!

Ek het 'n man wat ek nie kan vertrou nie. Ons bly in Brakpan,
Hy verneuk my so baie, ek weet nie eers of al die kinders wat ek het syne is nie!

Brakpan Slush Puppy.  Emmer sneeu en 750ml Klipdrif.
In Brakpan loop die honde twee-twee .... sodat die kinders hulle nie byt nie.

In Brakpan sukkel die ouens maar met die Engels.
Die matrieks skryf hulle engels 2de taal eindvraestel. Toe hulle klaar is, vra Koos vir Piet: 
"Hoe lyk jou leeu wat ons moes teken?"
"Watse leeu?" vra Piet.
Koos sê: "Het jy dan nie gesien nie? Onder aan die vraestel het gestaan 'Draw a line'

Don’t community picnic in celebration of TELFED'S 70th BIRTHDAY!

Thurs 27 September (3rd day Chol Hamoed Sukkot) 10am - 4pm

Kibbutz Nir Eliyahu Cost: NIS10 per person, maximum NIS50 per family

RSVP: peteyb4@gmail.com....This incorporates a Brakpan reunion…….

I have said soooo many times that the Puma’s Tukka deserve a break or two, and they were superb against the Aussies, even with Pocock & Falou, the Aussies could not manage to beta the Puma’s and it was also a famous win for the Puma’s……. They have tried soooo hard lately with not much success…….. 

A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair.
She lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.
"What troubles you, Sister?" asks the Mother Superior.
"I thought this was the day you spent with your family."
"It was," sighed the Sister. "And I went to play golf with my brother.
We try to play golf as often as we can. 
You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ."
"I seem to recall that," the Mother Superior agreed. 
"So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?"

"Far from it," snorted the Sister. "In fact, I even took the Lord's name in vain today!"
"Goodness, Sister!" gasped the Mother Superior, astonished. "You must tell me all about it!"
"Well, we were on the fifth tee...and this hole is a monster, Mother, 540 yard Par 5, with a nasty dogleg
left and a hidden green and I hit the drive of my life. 
I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made.
And it's flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted...and it hits a bird in mid-flight not 100 yards off the tee!"
"Oh my!" commiserated the Mother. "How unfortunate, but surely that didn't make you blaspheme, Sister!"
"No, that wasn't it," admitted Sister.  "While I was still trying to fathom what had happened, this squirrel runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!"
"Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!" sympathized Mother.  

"But I didn't, Mother Superior!" sobbed the Sister. "And I was so proud of myself! 
And while I was pondering whether this was a sign from G-d, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!"
"So that's when you cursed," said the Mother with a knowing smile.
"Nope, that wasn't it either," cried the Sister, anguished, "because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!"
Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest, fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said... 

"You missed the bloody putt, didn't you?" ( Einaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah….)

Manchester United Tukka battled in the end to beat Burnley, and their style is very boring to watch….Gone are the Dazzling days……. Never to be repeated…????

Manchester City keeps winning and it looks like they will be there at the end….. Liverpool had a good win over Spurs, and hopefully Knopp makes it to the end of the season, as he does not stop ‘Kogging’ with the officials…..

Those in the USofA can get their supply of Biltong, Droe Wors and other Souff Effrikken 'Gerichten' from Joburg Kosher Foods www.joburgkosher.com  details at http://www.stantgsm.com/category/info/15' …...  Running a 15% discount on dried products….

He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would fully suffice. - Albert Einstein
'Our wretched species is so made that those who walk on the well-trodden path always throw stones at those who are showing a new road.' - Voltaire
"We are half ruined by conformity, but we should be wholly ruined without it." - Charles Dudley Warner
One who walks in another's tracks leaves no footprints. – Proverb 

The man who works and is never bored is never old. Work and interest in worthwhile things are the best remedy for age. - Pablo Casals
'Keep some room in your heart for the unimaginable.' – Mary Oliver
You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind. – Joyce Meyer
Your life is your message to the world. Make sure its inspiring.¨ – Jean Michel Basquiat 
“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.” – attributed to  C.S. Lewis
God's greatest gift to you is your unlimited potential. Your greatest gift to God is to use that potential to the fullest.  - James Arthur Ray
Whatever may happen the sun will rise tomorrow as it rose to-day, beneficent and serene.  - Paul Gauguin

‘Shreklach’ is all one can say……

Revoke a license to murder …….

The story of the Blind Chazzan….Very moving …especially around Yomtov…..

Rugby World Cup: Cover up your tattoos in Japan, players told …….. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-45586210 

What a developing story……………

Last evening, according to local reports, a local Jewish lady, Lana Becker, ordered directly from a menu without asking for any changes, substitutions, or negotiating with the waitress.

We have not been able to independently verify the claims, but if confirmed, this would represent the first case in documented history of a Jew ordering food without making any changes or special requests.

“I simply did not know what to do,” said waitress Susan Smith. 

“She said ‘I would like the tuna on rye, please’ and then handed me back the menu.

“I just kept waiting but she didn’t say anything. No ‘can you hold the lettuce,’ no ‘can I substitute the coleslaw for pickles?’ Nothing! It was very scary,” said a clearly shaken Smith.

Though some have called into question the accuracy of Smith’s claim, others have taken a different approach. “If that did happen, and I’m not saying it didn’t, but if it did, then that woman who ordered was clearly not Jewish,” said local drapery consultant Mike Viner.

If confirmed, the effect of the incident would have enormous impact on the gastronomical identity of Jews around the world.

Please check back for details regarding this developing story.
Stop laughing...now you know our reputation proceeds us in any restaurant. 
And they didn't even mention not liking the table location (True…?)

Shabbos Shuva is a special Shabbos for me, for many reasons, and I have not missed one for many, many years…….. Standing Joke at Sandton Shul, as I once arrived the Shabbos before, realized my ‘Blaps’ and tried to leave, ….BUT they made me stay……. The Shul service on Shabbos was very nice, and a good crowd were there, including a baby naming for Brad & Hayley Yudelowitz’s new Princess….Mazzies to Howard & Louelle Ostrofsky (Highlands old boy) who sits behind me in Shul….and Doc Avie (Sydenham Shul ‘Boytjie’) & Ahrlene Yudelowitz and Jevan Sifrin the Barmy boy, who Tukka did an E-mazing job in ‘Leining’ the Parsha……He was VERY good, and I know that the Kinderlach that go to Yiddisher schools all do it well, BUT…. Jevan was Tukka very good…… OY, in our day it was nerve raking, as we attended Government schools and had a ‘bissel’ Cheder in the afternoons …..Mazeltov to Mark & Taryn Shifren, and to Bobba Sandra Chessen and Bobba & Zaida Carol & Norman Sifris……. Rabbi Shaw gave Jevan a very inspiring ‘Droshe’……Go back many years with the Sifris family, and besides the many Simcha’s I did for them, Carol’s Step Mom, Sheila Cartoon used to own President Wine & Brandy, and I started buying our liquor from her in the mid 70’s…… Carol tells me Sheila ( 94 ‘Kein N hora’) lives in Perth these days…… I did a Locum at the Simcha also, and it was an E-mazing Mexican theme and the Décor by Tanya Joss (Pop Balloon’s) was E-mazing…… Mazeltov to the whole Mishpocha…. Pictures; http://www.stantgsm.com/ 

The Chazzan came home Kol Nidrei night, and his wife asked him why he seemed to be a bit downcast. "Schwartz, the Shamus, told me I wasn't very good tonight" he replied. 

"Schwartz?" said his wife "Forget about him. He doesn't know anything. 

He just repeats what everyone else says ( Ja Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…..)

Isaac approaches his father Abraham and says, "Father, this old computer of ours need so much done to it. We need new programmes and new apps and and, and the fact is that we just don't have enough memory for everything that I want. What can we do?"

Abraham thought for a moment and then said," Isaac, the Lord will provide the RAM "

Hard to believe that Yom Kippur has already finished ……the years are tukka going very fast……. And the Service @ Sandton Shul was very ‘Balabatish’, with very good Droshe’s by the various ‘Rabbis’, and the Chazzan and choir really giving a good rendition….. Kol Nidre was excellent, with Chazzan Alter and the Choir excelling…… The Shul was FULL for Kol Nidre, which is very good in these times, with immigration and the ageing community slowly decreasing….. Chief Rabbi Warren Goldstein was a guest for Yom Kippur, and the Shabbos project weekend is the 26th./ 27th. October…… a month away….

The 'Koppie' & Mountain climbers, Jeff & Jenni are still climbing every 'Koppie' & Mountain... http://lazarowhike.blogspot.com/     'Gib A Kuk’
Still climbing every “ Koppie” and posting the most E-mazing Pikchaaaaaaa’s on their website  ….
They have having a GR888888 time in Romania …..Piatra Crailui Mountains: Cabana Curmatura, a Commencement Point.

Just a reminder that Dainius Ambrazaitis will be in Souff Effrikka straight after the Yontayvim and will be assisting Litvak’s in getting EU Passports….. The only charge is if the application is successful…. See http://stantgsm.com/view-post/lithuanian%20ancestry%20%20passport%20assistance/5829 for details....

“It’s panto-time again!  Music, dancing, sensational sparkly sets and a super story, jokes, laughter and ‘happy-ever-after’", declares Janice Honeyman.  “And this year it’s back to my very first panto ever, Snow White.  It has always been a great favourite of mine!  Why?  Because it’s sweet and sad, romantic, rollicking, funny, and full of fantasy. It’s at the Joburg Theatre and Bernard Jay present Janice Honeyman’s Snow White, The Fairest Panto in All The Land, opening on The Mandela Stage at Joburg Theatre on November 3rd and running until December 23rd! See details at ; http://stantgsm.com/category/info/15 and the Jewish Women’s Benevolent are having a premier of ‘ODD MAN OUT’ at the Theatre on the Square on the 20th. October …. Both GR888888888 events….. Don’t miss

Tony, a strong young man who worked at a New York construction site, was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of Chaim, an old Jewish electrician who worked on the site. After several minutes, Chaim had had enough. "

Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?" Chaim said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won't be able to wheel back."

"You're on, old man," Tony replied.

Old Chaim reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then he turned to Tony and said, "All right. Get in." ( Otazay….)

Crawford College Sandton had their Batmitzvah ceremony @ the Sandton Banquet Hall, Sandton Shul on Sunday, and it Tukka was an E-mazing ceremony/ Simcha ..The décor by Angelique was quite E-mazing, and the Marathon Man, Jonny Birin assisted with the ceremony and had Shmueli Brill also….. The dancing SESSIONS WERE THE BEST I HAVE SEEN RECENTLY , with Johnny ( on his ace) quite superb in keeping the Kinderlach going flat out for 4 hours…….Really was an enjoyable morning for all ….Pictures;  http://www.stantgsm.com/ 

This week the use of Cannabis (Dagga) has been legalized for home use… Eishhhhhhhhh , what a dumb move…..people are Tukka over dosing already, and now it has been legalized…???? ‘A Zillion’ cartoons around  …..

Monday is Heritage day, and is better known as National Braaaaai Day….Nog a L-O-N-G weekend for the ‘wekkers’…… and of course it is Succoth also……. Should get some rain, if past years are anything to go by…..

Blonde’s Yomtov cooking tips……

It's fun to cook for Yossy. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbours were nice enough to loan me the extra bowls. 

He wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn't dress. What a surprise when he brought a friend home for dinner.

A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can't say it improved the rice any. 

Today he asked for salad again I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Asked me why I was rolling around in the garden.. 

I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it.. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

He did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don't have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason he keeps counting to ten.

I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

Discovery Health launched their Plans/contributions for 2019, last week @ Gallagher’s Estate, and it is E-mazing that after 25 years, they still manage to build a hype, and get 5,000 at a launch and it was relayed by satellite to all the Major Cities in Souff Effrikka…….. Eishhhhhhhhhh, quite a few small Medical changes, and like EVERY year, MAJOR Vitality changes…… and although the rewards are richer, it is going to be much harder for us ‘Nog Shleppers’ to reach goal, as it is now being designed to cater for those who Tukka exercise, and a lot of Exercise is needed to maintain your status……No more drive thru’s and swiping cards …. Methinks you will eventually need a fit bit/watch/tracking devise to get enough points, and one of the new benefits is a Huawei fit bit that members can get for free ‘EVENTUALLY’, BUT….they will have to get to goal every week…. The new Vitality Points rewards, will really get things going with some good rewards, BUT…..will anyone actually get them….??? Most members can look at a 10% increase, does vary a bit according to plan type, BUT…..if you just add 10% to this year’s cost, you will be pretty close…. Need assistance, give me a ring…. 011-809-7837….082-4547860….. If there are any readers not on Discovery, BUT….go to Gym, you will be able to sign on, FREE of charge to Vitality open till year end, and have a chance to win prizes for the next 10 weeks….Drop me an e-mail @ stan.smookler@sasfin.com 

Abe and Sarah lying in bed. Freezing weather.

Sarah says, “ Abe, oy it’s so cold I’m freezing.” So Abe gets up and gets an extra blanket from the cupboard.

“ Are you a bit warmer, feigele ?  “ he asks.

“ Oy “ she replies. “ I’m still a bit cold.” So he gets up once more and gets a thick woollen jersey and puts it on her.

“ Now are you warm ?” he says.

Sarah replies, “ You know, Abe. When I was a little girl in bed in winter, my mother would come lie next to me and snuggle up to keep me warm. Oy, a meichel.” 

Abe looks at her and says, “ For G-d’s sake, Sarah, it’s one o’clock in the morning. 

I’m NOT going to fetch your mother!!” ( Abe = Chaim Shmerel….)

One of our Sandton ‘Choir Boys’ does ‘Shlepping’ for all kinds of trips , and goes quite far…. He does lifting + courier work "Experienced reliable driver available to lift you anywhere/anytime.24 hours. Airports, appointments, Sun City etc. Confidential Courier work also undertaken. Call or text Paul Minsker 083-5426480 or e-mail minskers@polka.co.za " see http://www.stantgsm.com/category/info/15 for details

Morris goes to the rabbi and says, "I committed a sin and I want to know what I can do to repent." 

 "What was the sin?" the Rabbi asked.

 "It happened just once," Morris assures him. "I didn't wash my hands and recite the blessing before eating bread."

 "Nu, if it really only happened once," the rabbi said, "that's not so terrible. Nonetheless, why did you neglect to wash your hands and recite the blessing?"

 "I felt awkward Rabbi," said Morris. "You see, I was in an un-kosher restaurant."

 The rabbi's eyebrows arch. "And why were you eating in an un-kosher restaurant?"

 "I had no choice," Morris said. "All the kosher restaurants were closed."

 "And why were all the kosher restaurants closed?" the rabbi asked.

 Morris replied, "It was Yom Kippur." ( OY…………..VY….).

Eli is a Genealogist of note……….. Eli Rabinowitz – 'Gib A Kuk' at his blog…E-mazing news from 'Der Heims' & The 'Beloved Country'…. http://elirab.me/

"Exhibition at Perth Town Hall Official Opening "I Am My Brother's Keeper"

The killing of Ari Fuld has really captured the social media, and I even saw a positive article in a Souff Effrikken newspaper about his tragic death…. And the USA /EU are all very annoyed…… does it help….??? By the out pouring, this has to be one of the saddest losses http://thelandofisrael.com/remembering-ari-fuld-hero-of-israel/ ….sooooo sad that these incidents keep occuring, and nothing seems to stop them…???

21st Century Synagogue………

RABBI MONDAY MORNING IN SHUL: "Will everyone please turn on their tablet, PC, iPad, smart phone, and Kindles to Art Scroll page 232. And please switch on your Bluetooth to download the sermon." P-a-u-s-e...... 

"Now, let us daven. Open your Apps, BBM, Twitter and Facebook, and chat with God"

S-i-l-e-n-c-e....... "As we accept your kind tzedakah donations, please have your credit and debit cards ready." "You can log on to the Shul Wi-Fi using the password 'Hashem18.' The Shammes will circulate mobile card swipe machines among the congregants: Those who prefer to make electronic fund transfers are directed to computers and laptops at the rear of the Shul. Those who prefer to make electronic fund transfers are directed to computers and laptops at the rear of the Shul. Those who prefer to use iPads can open them. 

Those who prefer telephone banking, take out your cell phones to transfer your contributions to the Shul account.”

This week's shiur will be held on the various Facebook group pages where the usual group chatting takes place. Please log in and don't miss out. Thursday's Talmud Torah study will be held live on Skype at 1900hrs GMT. Please don't miss out. You can follow the Rabbi on Twitter this weekend for counselling and prayers.

Hope the fast was good….. and have a GR888888 Succoth, which is always relaxed and enjoyable, Simchat Torah……and then back to normal until Chanukah…..

Anne Sclar's saying for the week….. Travelworx ; travelworx@telkomsa.net

Only you can do what you can do the way you can do it

Justice Malala looks into the possible folding of the ICC, and fingers Jacob Zuma as one of those who tried to close it down, BUT….last week Donald Trump put the final nail in… https://select.timeslive.co.za/ideas/2018-09-17-zuma-dances-with-the-despots-on-the-grave-of-the-icc/

A light hearted look at Zuma and his ‘Tjommies’ meeting in Durban https://select.timeslive.co.za/ideas/2018-09-12-spare-a-thought-for-poor-old-beach-slapped-zuma/ ….unfortuneatly it is quite Seriaaaaaaaaas, and only yesterday did the ‘Buffalo’ make a statement on the supposed ganging up on him, to skop him out, and heaven help us, bring Jacob back, which IF it ever got to that , The Beloved country would not see another year…..sooooo hopefully ‘Ooooooom Cyril’ has got the threat under control and that is the end of that..???

Chappies.. Did U know ……….
http://stantgsm.com/view-post/chappies%20 %20fascinating%20story/5408
Did you know that it would require 2 million hydrogen atoms to cover a full stop (.)
Did you know that the revolving door was invented in 1888

Eishhhhhhhhhhhhh, not only crime is a scourge in the Beloved country, BUT…..it looks like stock theft is on the rise, and I was E-mazed to see how huge the problem was….. https://select.timeslive.co.za/news/2018-09-14-stock-theft-its-sas-forgotten-scourge-and-its-on-the-up/

Gerald David’s Taxi Service is available for reliable and friendly airport shuttles and more. Contact Gerald on either 082 907 5507 or 011786 6580 (The ‘Yiddisher Shlepper’) ………. davids2@telkomsa.net

To modern, ultra & just plain Orthodox Jews, HarediJews, Mitnagdim, Chasidim, Conservative, Conservadox, Reform & ConForm Jews, Gartel Jews, non-Gartel Jews, Jews with sheitels & without, Tichel Jews, Sheitel, tichel & hat Jews, Frum from birth Jews, Baalei Teshuva,

black hat, kipa s'ruga, payos in front of the ear Jews, payos in back of the ear Jews, kipa only in shul/ hat in shul/ no shul at all Jews, Mizrachi Jews, Aguda Jews, 

Jews by choice, Bathrobe on Friday night Jews, cardiac Jews, Black Jews, White Jews, 3-day-a-year Jews, Neturei Karta Jews, JTS, RJJ, HUC, HTC, MTJ, BMT Jews, NCSY Jews, Feminist Jews, traditional Jews, Kaddish Jews, political Jews, intellectual Jews, Tomato Jews & orange Jews, Birthright Jews, single Jews, married Jews, wish I was married Jews, Galitzianers,

Litvaks, Polacks, Greener Jews, Redder Jews, Jews in kapatas, Jews in T-shirts, Hungarian Jews, Romanian Jews,Czech Jews, Jews on the Hungarian-Czech Border Jews, Ashkenazim, Sefardim, Yemenite Jews, Jews with an accent,

Jews who speak perfect Midwestern English Hebrew, Zionists, non-Zionists, anti-Zionists, post-Zionists, Closet Jews, Shnorrers, Baalei Tzedaka, Tzadikim, Kohanim, Levi'im,

Yisraelim, Machers, M'vinim, & Poshet Jews,

EVERYKIND of Jew in this vast Universe:

May we all unite - without a fight! - and together ignite G-d's great light.

May we see a sweet and blessed year together with a true peace.

Shana Tova Umtuka! …………… Peace in Israel… Amen.


FOR the MOST 'Jacked up' 'Yiddisher' Wedding registry, 'Gib A Kuk'   at; www.binuns.co.za     …… Online Helpdesk … 0861 772 665

Mazeltov to Barney Gordon on his 96th. Birthday…. Barney was an ‘old’ Jewish Guild stalwart , and I met him in the mid 70’s at the Club….He has been very involved in Maccabi and sport in general over the years, and a good Chaver of Ooooom Solly Krok …. Barney was a soldier in the war era, and has many medals to his name….. Many more Barney in good health, and wish Marion many more good years together with Barney…..

Mazeltov to Melissa & Steven Morris on the birth of their Princess in Slaaaaapstad…..Mazeltov to Ellen & the Late Julian Oschry and to the Sarah & Michael Morris…….. Sarah is a ‘Tzu ge Tzebete’ Cuzzie of mine ( Cuzzie of a Cuzzie)…. Ellen & Late Julian have been members of Sandton Shul for many years…..  … Mazeltov to the whole Mishpocha….


MANTIS SECURITY TIP (Call 011- 487-1000) of the week:
  • Always have your alarm on when not in the house…..it does help…
  • Keep the security gates locked at all times…
  • The locks on the front gate arms are a joke, not sure what the answer is….
  • If possible, use Trellidors /Maxi , as the standard burglar proofing is moved with a crow bar very easily…..….
  • Keep the hard drive back up unit, far from the eyes of prowlers……among clothes is usually the best …
  • Keep records of purchases and serial numbers…….The Cops might just find the ‘Goods , if they have the serial numbers…
  • Never leave electronic equipment just lying around, keep it out of sight…
  • Small jewellery should also not be left on dressing tables…….
  • Getting to the stage that I wonder if anything is a deterrent these days………

Be ‘Wakker’ & ‘StreetwiZe’ all the time…………

Call; Mark Kramer @ MANTIS (011- 487-1000) for advice and sign up and discuss it with his experienced staff. 

Have a peaceful, restful Shabbos...From Stan and the Clan


Eerbare Makelaaaaaar van Suid Afrika ………

Cell- 082-454-7860

Parsha of The Week 

Rabbi Yossy Goldman,’                                                                                BH    
Sydenham Shul,
C/O ‘Beloved Country’   



                                         A Sukkot Message  

Many years ago, when downtown Johannesburg was still home to Jewish shopkeepers and office dwellers, in my capacity as Director of Chabad House, I would always organize the Central City Sukkah. The little booth stood at the foot of the Carlton Centre, at the time Africa’s biggest office and shopping complex, providing food, refreshments and, of course, the Lulav and Etrog for the many Jews in the district.

One year, I asked a photographer to take a shot of the Sukkah and the Carlton Centre skyscraper together. He had to use a rather sophisticated lens to get them both into one picture. Naturally, the Sukkah was dwarfed by the skyscraper. But I couldn’t help thinking that, in the end, that humble little Sukkah would outlast even the mightiest of skyscrapers.

Indeed, since 9/11 and the collapse of the world’s tallest towers, that feeling is even stronger.

There are two opinions in the Talmud as to what we commemorate when we build our Sukkah. One is that it recalls the Booths our ancestors built to shelter themselves from the burning desert sun after the Exodus from Egypt. The other, is that the Sukkah recalls not a physical shelter, but the spiritual shelter provided by the Clouds of Glory, Hashem’s protective cover that shielded them from many harmful effects.

Rashi, in his commentary on the Bible seems to favour the latter opinion of spiritual rather than physical shelter. This seems to be corroborated by the Halacha in the Laws of Sukkah that if the Schach, the leafy covering is so thick that the rain cannot penetrate, then the Sukkah is actually invalid (posul).

It would seem that the purpose of the Sukkah is to remind us wherein lies our true security. It is in the protective cover of G-d, as symbolized by the Clouds of Glory, rather than in our own man-made shelters.

This is, in fact, the most important moral lesson we are meant to derive from this beautiful Festival. “Life is but a Sukkah,” a temporary dwelling, here today, gone tomorrow - “a fleeting dream,” as we said on Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur.

So where do we look for strength, hope, salvation and our ultimate security? Not in the mighty man-made skyscrapers. We have seen all too horribly and vividly on our television screens how the mightiest towers on earth collapsed like a deck of cards! What took the most advanced society on our planet ten years to build, took a few madmen ten minutes to destroy!

And now life in South Africa is a mirror of the meshugaas that happens elsewhere. Today, an ordinary trip on an airplane requires taking off our shoes and being scanned for weapons; and even a little scissors or a vial of liquid is suspect. And this year we have seen unprecedented security measures around all our Jewish centres. Suddenly, nowhere is safe.

Yes, at the end of the day, “Life is but a Sukkah.” When we realise our own vulnerability and our dependence on G-d for our life, our livelihood, our safety and security, then we begin to understand that we are under His protective shield. And then, wherever we are we can feel safe in His embrace. 

Every year, in my Sukkah at home we sing an old Yiddish song called “Ah Sukkele ah Kleineh” – or, The Little Sukkah. It is the story of a dilapidated, barely-standing Sukkah that is being threatened by gale force winds. The wife and daughter of the house are petrified that any moment their Sukkah will, G-d forbid, collapse. But their husband and father comforts them, reminding them that their little Sukkah is still standing for over 2000 years. The Sukkah becomes the symbol of the Jewish condition - frail and vulnerable but, inevitably, indestructible. Somehow, by the grace of G-d, we survive to live another day, come what may.

No winds can destroy the Jewish Sukkah. Our traveling tabernacle has given us shelter from the winds of change that swept through many continents over the centuries of Jewish journeys.  When we remember that it is Hashem, the Guardian of Israel, who is our ultimate shelter and source of security, we find strength and serenity no matter what is howling outside.

May we all enter the Sukkah literally and figuratively and find the shelter and security we all seek in the warm embrace of the small but impregnable Sukkah. 

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